An old man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, \u201cI hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.\u201d\n
\u2018Dad, what are you talking about?\u2019 the son screams.\n
\u201cWe can\u2019t stand the sight of each other any longer,\u201d the father says.\n
\u201cWe\u2019re sick of each other and I\u2019m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Leeds and tell her.\u201d Franticly, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. \u201cLike hell, they\u2019re getting divorced!\u201d\n
She shouts, \u201cI\u2019ll take care of this!\u201d She calls Scotland immediately and screams at her father \u201cYou are NOT getting divorced.\n
Don\u2019t do a single thing until I get there. I\u2019m calling my brother back, and we\u2019ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don\u2019t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?\u201d and hangs up.\n
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. \u2018Sorted! They\u2019re coming for Christmas \u2013 and they\u2019re paying their own way.\u2019\n
Source: funnyhours\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
An old man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, \u201cI hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.\u201d \u2018Dad, what are you talking about?\u2019 the son screams. \u201cWe can\u2019t stand the …\n","protected":false},"author":29,"featured_media":73275,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[676,642],"tags":[990,384,698,370,1180],"class_list":["post-73274","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-jokes","category-moral-story","tag-father","tag-jokes","tag-family","tag-funny","tag-old-man"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/73274","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/29"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=73274"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/73274\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":73276,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/73274\/revisions\/73276"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/73275"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=73274"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=73274"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=73274"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}