{"id":79617,"date":"2024-09-06T09:49:21","date_gmt":"2024-09-06T02:49:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/?p=79617"},"modified":"2024-09-06T09:49:21","modified_gmt":"2024-09-06T02:49:21","slug":"my-husband-left-me-and-now-hes-asking-to-come-back-because-he-has-cancer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/my-husband-left-me-and-now-hes-asking-to-come-back-because-he-has-cancer\/","title":{"rendered":"My Husband Left Me. And Now He\u2019s Asking To Come Back Because He Has Cancer"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Betrayal by\u00a0a\u00a0spouse, divorce, and property division are incredibly challenging times that require a\u00a0long recovery. However, sometimes the divorce is\u00a0not the end. A\u00a0woman shared her story on\u00a0Reddit about her ex-husband, who left four years ago in\u00a0search of\u00a0a\u00a0younger wife, now wanting to\u00a0come back because he\u00a0is\u00a0diagnosed with cancer and wishes his ex-wife to\u00a0take care of\u00a0him.\n\n

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A\u00a0woman\u00a0got into a\u00a0conflict with her kids due to\u00a0her refusal to\u00a0help her\u00a0ex.\n\n
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My\u00a0ex-husband and\u00a0I had 3\u00a0children (25F, 23F and 22M). We\u00a0separated 4\u00a0years ago after he\u00a0said he\u00a0was tired of\u00a0seeing my\u00a0old face every day and wanted to\u00a0find someone younger (his words to\u00a0my\u00a0face when asking for divorce). The divorce was a\u00a0mess, he\u00a0tried in\u00a0every way to\u00a0take everything I\u00a0had, and\u00a0I even had to\u00a0take on\u00a0half of\u00a0his debts. Long story short, I\u00a0never talked to\u00a0him again face to\u00a0face, and we\u00a0only talk through lawyers when it\u2019s something about our children.\n

Months ago, from my\u00a0children, I\u00a0found out that he\u00a0was diagnosed with cancer, and it\u00a0is\u00a0in\u00a0an\u00a0advanced stage. I\u00a0didn\u2019t say anything more about\u00a0it, because any topic related to\u00a0him doesn\u2019t appeal to\u00a0me, but\u00a0I decided to\u00a0support my\u00a0children and stay by\u00a0their side.\n\n

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Yesterday, my\u00a03\u00a0children (all live with\u00a0me) sat down with me\u00a0telling me\u00a0that their father could no\u00a0longer work (chemo + cancer) and wouldn\u2019t be\u00a0able to\u00a0stay in\u00a0his current home, so\u00a0he\u00a0had nowhere to\u00a0live, and they would like for him to\u00a0live here in\u00a0these last stages. I\u00a0immediately said no\u00a0and that\u00a0I felt offended that\u00a0I had even been asked that question, knowing how much he\u00a0and\u00a0I dislike each other.\n

They started to\u00a0argue, saying that our house was his last option, because his relatives couldn\u2019t, and they didn\u2019t want to\u00a0leave their father without a\u00a0home and that\u00a0I should think about them. I\u00a0asked who would take care of\u00a0him when things got worse, because all three of\u00a0them work outside the home and\u00a0I work from home, or\u00a0who would cover all of\u00a0his financial and medical expenses. They didn\u2019t know how to\u00a0answer and that they would decide between the 3\u00a0of\u00a0them to\u00a0help their father and not be\u00a0so\u00a0burdensome for me\u00a0and that the 3\u00a0of\u00a0them were willing to\u00a0let their father live in\u00a0our house.\n\n

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I\u00a0said that despite valuing their opinion on\u00a0any other matter in\u00a0the house, this matter is\u00a0my\u00a0decision alone, and it\u00a0remains\u00a0no. They called me\u00a0heartless and said that they are just trying to\u00a0give their father a\u00a0place to\u00a0live, not my\u00a0ex-husband. And I\u00a0was being petty about all the things he\u00a0did and not thinking about them.\n

They\u2019re still pressuring me\u00a0to\u00a0change my\u00a0mind, especially with their father only having 15\u00a0more days in\u00a0his house, but\u00a0I can\u2019t feel anything other than offended that they asked that, knowing how much the divorce messed with\u00a0me (depression and anxiety). My\u00a0ex\u00a0got in\u00a0touch on\u00a0my\u00a0personal number, asking to\u00a0rethink and leave the past behind just in\u00a0these last moments. Funny that he\u00a0asked\u00a0me, but not his exes much younger than\u00a0me.\n\n

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Netizens agreed with the poster.\n

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  • At\u00a022\u201325 years old, kids are old enough to\u00a0realize it\u2019s an\u00a0unreasonable ask of\u00a0their mother and to\u00a0make their own sacrifices to\u00a0take care of\u00a0him if\u00a0they want\u00a0to. Not to\u00a0expect mommy to\u00a0do\u00a0it\u00a0for them. People live on\u00a0their own at\u00a0that age. It\u2019s kind and caring their mom is\u00a0letting them live at\u00a0home until they\u2019re ready to\u00a0be\u00a0off on\u00a0their own. They should appreciate that. She\u2019s not stopping them from helping their father or\u00a0trying to\u00a0discourage them for doing\u00a0so. She just understandably doesn\u2019t want it\u00a0done in\u00a0her home, on\u00a0her time and on\u00a0her dime.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0exscapegoat\u00a0\/ Reddit\n
  • If\u00a0adult kids see their mother like their personal slave whose feelings do\u00a0not matter, whose value lies only in\u00a0her ability to\u00a0be\u00a0useful for others, and who is\u00a0obliged to\u00a0provide for everybody who happens to\u00a0want her unpaid labor, property, on\u00a0money, well, it\u00a0is\u00a0better to\u00a0just kick out such kids. Kids can rent a\u00a04-bedroom apartment and move together with their daddy. Two can work full-time jobs and pay bills, the third can take care of\u00a0their father. There is\u00a0only so\u00a0much exploitation and emotional abuse a\u00a0mother should tolerate. There is\u00a0a\u00a0point where kids moving out and going low contact.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0AndreasAvester\u00a0\/ Reddit\n
  • You two have three adult children. If\u00a0they feel dear old dad needs looking after in\u00a0his final moments, then they can move in\u00a0with him or\u00a0move into a\u00a0place with him and rearrange their lives to\u00a0care for him on\u00a0a\u00a0rotating basis. Three adult incomes plus his equity\/pension\/disability should be\u00a0enough for them to\u00a0manage\u00a0it. Of\u00a0course that means sacrificing their own time, space and money, rather than yours, so\u00a0they might not want to\u00a0go\u00a0for that. Your kids are probably getting a\u00a0lot of\u00a0psychological pressure from their dad, but they should be\u00a0old enough to\u00a0recognize that it\u2019s unfair and manipulative and should not be\u00a0putting this to\u00a0you at\u00a0all. Shut this down and if\u00a0they try to\u00a0guilt you, offer to\u00a0help them find a\u00a0place. You are not the bad guy. He\u00a0was the one who didn\u2019t want to\u00a0do, \u2019in sickness and in\u00a0health, till death do\u00a0us part.\u2019 This is\u00a0not up\u00a0for discussion or\u00a0debate.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0Alternative_Boat9540\u00a0\/ Reddit\n\n\n
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