{"id":80953,"date":"2024-09-16T09:58:12","date_gmt":"2024-09-16T02:58:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/?p=80953"},"modified":"2024-09-16T09:58:12","modified_gmt":"2024-09-16T02:58:12","slug":"7-hilarious-dog-jokes-that-will-make-you-howl-with-laughter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/7-hilarious-dog-jokes-that-will-make-you-howl-with-laughter\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Hilarious Dog Jokes That Will Make You Howl with Laughter"},"content":{"rendered":"
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From a dog with a knack for shopping to a talking canine with a wild past, these seven jokes perfectly capture the comedic side of our four-legged friends. Get ready to laugh at the antics only dogs can pull off!\n\n

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A closeup of a dog wearing sunglasses | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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1. A Dinner Table Dilemma\n\n
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A girl was meeting her boyfriend\u2019s parents for the first time. Unfortunately, she was dealing with a severely upset stomach. As they were seated at the dinner table, she had to try and release some of the crippling pressure and decided to let out a little gas quietly.\n\n

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Her \u201clittle\u201d fart resulted in a squeak audible enough for everyone at the table to hear. Their heads snapped up, and the father looked at her, then at the dog lying on the floor behind her chair, and\u00a0said,\u00a0\u201cMax.\u201d\n\n

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A closeup of a white Siberian Husky lying on a floor | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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\u201cThis is great,\u201d she thought. \u201cThey think it was the dog,\u201d and everyone went back to eating.\n\n

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Five minutes later, the pain returned, and she felt the need to relieve more pressure. Without shifting, she let out another bit of wind, this time twice as loud as the last. Everyone looked up again, and the father said, \u201cMAX!\u201d much to her delight. Everyone resumed eating.\n\n

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Feeling much better but still not out of the woods, the girl decided to go for the gusto and completely relieve herself from the still-present pain of the gastro-fiend.\n\n

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A woman sitting at a dinner table holding a glass of red wine | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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Brimming with confidence, she let out an unholy ripper, all of which lasted nearly four seconds. Everyone stopped eating and looked at one another. The father put down his fork, rose from his chair, looked at the dog, and shouted, \u201cMax! For the love of God! Get away from there before she craps on you!!\u201d\n\n

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2. The Genius Shopper\n\n
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As a butcher was shooing a dog from his shop, he saw a $10 bill and a note in the dog\u2019s mouth,\u00a0reading,\u00a0\u201cFive lamb chops, please.\u201d\n\n

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A closeup of grilled lamb chops | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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Amazed, he took the money, put a bag of chops in the dog\u2019s mouth, and quickly closed the shop. He followed the dog and watched him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop.\n\n

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The dog checked the timetable and sat on the bench. When a bus arrived, he walked around to the front, looked at the number, then boarded the bus. The butcher followed, dumbstruck. As the bus traveled out into the suburbs, the dog took in the scenery.\n\n

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A dog traveling in a bus | Source: Midjourney\n\n\n

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After a while, he stood on his back paws to push the \u201cStop\u201d bell, and the butcher followed him off the bus.\n\n

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The dog ran up to a house and dropped his bag on the step. He went back down the path, lined up for a big sprint, and threw himself against the door.\u00a0Whap!\u00a0He did this again and again with no answer. So he jumped on a wall, walked around the garden, beat his head against a window, jumped off, and waited at the front door.\n\n

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A German Shepherd in front of a house | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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A big guy opened it and started cursing and shouting at the dog. The butcher ran up and screamed at the guy, \u201cWhat the hell are you doing? This dog\u2019s a genius!\u201d\n\n

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The owner responded, \u201cGenius, my butt\u2026 It\u2019s the second time this week he\u2019s forgotten his keys!\u201d\n\n

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3. The Nap-Loving Visitor\n\n
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An old, tired-looking dog wandered into a man\u2019s yard. He could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. The dog calmly came over to the man, who gave him a few pats on his head.\n\n

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A man holding a phone pats a dog | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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The dog then followed the man into his house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner, and fell asleep.\n\n

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An hour later, he went to the door, and the man let him out. The next day, the dog was back. He greeted the man in his yard, walked inside, and resumed his spot in the hall, again sleeping for about an hour. This continued on and off for several weeks.\n\n

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A man pats a dog while he is lying on the floor | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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Curious one day, the man\u00a0pinned a note\u00a0to the dog\u2019s collar, \u201cI would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful, sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.\u201d\n\n

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The next day, the dog arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar, \u201cHe lives in a home with six children, two under the age of three; he\u2019s trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?\u201d\n\n

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A man laughing | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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4. The Plasterer at the Pub\n\n
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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich. The bartender looks at him and\u00a0says,\u00a0\u201cHang on! You\u2019re a dog.\u201d\n\n

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\u201cI see your eyes are working,\u201d replies the dog.\n\n

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\u201cAnd you can talk!\u201d exclaims the bartender.\n\n

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\u201cI see your ears are working, too,\u201d says the dog. \u201cNow, if you don\u2019t mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich, please?\u201d\n\n

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\u201cCertainly, sorry about that,\u201d says the bartender as he pulls the dog\u2019s pint. \u201cIt\u2019s just we don\u2019t get many dogs in this pub. What brings you this way?\u201d\n\n

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A bartender pouring wine into a glass | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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\u201cI\u2019m working on the building site across the road,\u201d explains the dog. \u201cI\u2019m a plasterer.\u201d\n\n

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The flabbergasted bartender cannot believe the dog and wants to learn more but takes the hint when the dog pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it. The dog reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the bartender a good day, and leaves. The same thing happens for two weeks.\n\n

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A dog sitting on a pavement | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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Then one day, the circus comes to town. The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint, and the bartender says to him, \u201cYou\u2019re with the circus, aren\u2019t you? Well, I know this dog that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper, and everything!\u201d\n\n

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\u201cSounds marvelous,\u201d says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. \u201cGet him to give me a call.\u201d\n\n

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The next day, when the dog comes into the pub, the bartender says, \u201cHey, Mr. Dog, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money.\u201d\n\n

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100 U.S. Dollar Banknotes | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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\u201cI\u2019m always looking for the next job,\u201d says the dog. \u201cWhere is it?\u201d\n\n

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\u201cAt the circus,\u201d says the bartender.\n\n

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\u201cThe circus?\u201d repeats the dog.\n\n

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\u201cThat\u2019s right,\u201d replies the bartender.\n\n

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\u201cThe circus?\u201d The dog asks again. \u201cWith the big tent?\u201d\n\n

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\u201cYeah,\u201d the bartender replies.\n\n

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\u201cWith all the animals who live in cages and performers who live in caravans?\u201d says the dog.\n\n

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\u201cOf course,\u201d the bartender replies.\n\n

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\u201cAnd the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?\u201d persists the dog.\n\n

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A happy dog popping out his tongue | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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\u201cThat\u2019s right!\u201d says the bartender.\n\n

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The dog shakes his head in amazement and says, \u201cWhy in the world would they want a plasterer??!\u201d\n\n

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5. Corgi Comedy\n\n
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Why aren\u2019t\u00a0Corgi jokes\u00a0funny?\n\n

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All of them are really short.\n\n

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A high-angle photo of a Corgi looking upwards | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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6. The Talking Dog for Sale\n\n
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A guy spots a sign in front of a house,\u00a0which reads,\u00a0\u201cTalking dog for sale.\u201d He rings the bell, and the owner explains that the dog is in the backyard. The guy ventures to the backyard and sees a dog just sitting there.\n\n

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\u201cYou talk?\u201d he asks.\n\n

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\u201cYep,\u201d the dog replies.\n\n

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\u201cSo, what\u2019s your story?\u201d\n\n

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A man crouching and patting a dog | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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The dog looks up and says, \u201cWell, I discovered I could talk pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift. In no time, they had me jetting from country to country. I sat in rooms with spies and world leaders because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.\u201d\n\n

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A K9 dog sitting on the grass | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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\u201cThe jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn\u2019t getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I\u2019m just retired.\u201d\n\n

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The guy is astounded. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.\n\n

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The owner says, \u201cTen dollars.\u201d\n\n

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A Siberian Husky winking | Source: Pexels\n\n\n

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The guy says, \u201cThis dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?\u201d\n\n

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The owner replies, \u201cHe\u2019s just a big liar. He didn\u2019t do any of that stuff.\u201d\n\n

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7. The Skateboarding Dog\n\n
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A man was talking to his neighbor one day. He\u00a0said,\u00a0\u201cI\u2019ve really had it with my dog. He\u2019ll chase anyone on a skateboard.\u201d\n\n

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\u201cHmmm, that is a problem,\u201d answered the neighbor, slightly concerned. \u201cWhat are you thinking of doing about it?\u201d\n\n

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The man shrugged and replied, \u201cGuess the only answer is to confiscate his skateboard.\u201d\n\n

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A closeup of a dog on a skateboard | Source: Freepik\n\n\n

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Whether they\u2019re causing mischief or just being their lovable selves, dogs have a way of bringing joy and laughter into our lives. These jokes are a testament to the hilarious and heartwarming moments that only our furry friends can create.\n\n

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Ready to laugh some more? We\u2019ve got you covered with our compilation of the\u00a0seven most hilarious jokes\u00a0about husband and wife relationships.\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

From a dog with a knack for shopping to a talking canine with a wild past, these seven jokes perfectly capture the comedic side of our four-legged friends. Get ready to laugh at the antics only dogs can pull off! A closeup of a dog wearing sunglasses | Source: Pexels 1. A Dinner Table Dilemma …\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":80954,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[232],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-80953","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-quiz"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/80953","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/30"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=80953"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/80953\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":80955,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/80953\/revisions\/80955"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/80954"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=80953"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=80953"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=80953"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}