{"id":83649,"date":"2024-10-04T14:34:36","date_gmt":"2024-10-04T07:34:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/?p=83649"},"modified":"2024-10-04T14:40:15","modified_gmt":"2024-10-04T07:40:15","slug":"my-parents-snubbed-my-wedding-invitations-and-our-family-harshly-shamed-them","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/my-parents-snubbed-my-wedding-invitations-and-our-family-harshly-shamed-them\/","title":{"rendered":"My Parents Snubbed My Wedding Invitations, and Our Family Harshly Shamed Them"},"content":{"rendered":"
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A\u00a0Reddit user\u00a0disclosed\u00a0what happened.\n\n
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\u00a9\u00a0AA’s Photography \/ Pexels\n
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So\u00a0I\u00a0have a\u00a0younger brother, Mike. He\u00a0is\u00a0the definition of\u00a0a\u00a0man-child and a\u00a0mama\u2019s boy, always complaining, and always expecting others to\u00a0bow to\u00a0him. Ever since he\u00a0was born, my\u00a0parents fussed over him for everything. He\u2019s not special needs or\u00a0had a\u00a0traumatic birth or\u00a0anything of\u00a0the sort. He\u00a0was just… born. And my\u00a0parents completely discarded\u00a0me. My\u00a0mom especially. She went from a\u00a0loving mother to\u00a0one of\u00a0those boy moms that people make fun of\u00a0on\u00a0the internet.\n

My father still showed me love and support, but he\u2019s always been too much of a coward to stand up to my mother and let me win at least once. The only one who stood up for me was my grandpa (76M), who always called my parents out on their bullshit, and never liked my brother. I remind him of his late wife, my grandma, and we have a very special bond, but he lives on the other side of the country and I could never see him often.\n\n

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\u00a9\u00a0Andrea Piacquadio \/ Pexels\n
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Mike knows our mom prefers him, and loves to\u00a0shove it\u00a0in\u00a0my\u00a0face. Because of\u00a0this and his behavior, we\u2019ve always been at\u00a0odds. He\u2019s spoiled, a\u00a0brat, and an\u00a0awful human. I\u00a0can\u2019t remember how many times\u00a0I ended up\u00a0in\u00a0trouble for things\u00a0I did better than him or\u00a0for things he\u00a0framed me\u00a0with. His only talent is\u00a0his football skills. He\u00a0won a\u00a0scholarship to\u00a0a\u00a0nice college out of\u00a0state. My\u00a0parents didn\u2019t spend a\u00a0dime on\u00a0my\u00a0education because apparently my\u00a0fund had been used to\u00a0cover expenses after a\u00a0fire, just for me\u00a0to\u00a0discover years later that said money was given to\u00a0Mike to\u00a0buy a\u00a0car and a\u00a0house.\n\n

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\u00a9 Liliana Drew \/ Pexels\n
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It\u00a0was at\u00a0the public university that\u00a0I met Lucas. He\u00a0was the first person\u00a0I was drawn to\u00a0there. Of\u00a0course, I\u00a0met new people who are now my\u00a0dearest friends, and thanks to\u00a0them and Lucas, who was my\u00a0best friend for years before we\u00a0got together, I\u00a0managed to\u00a0move out of\u00a0my\u00a0parents\u2019 house. Now, both Lucas and\u00a0I are well-known in\u00a0our fields and have very good salaries.\n

Now, to\u00a0the main issue. Lucas proposed to\u00a0me\u00a0a\u00a0year ago. We\u2019re very private people, so\u00a0we\u00a0didn\u2019t post it\u00a0on\u00a0social media or\u00a0anything, and when\u00a0I told my\u00a0parents they dismissed it\u00a0with a\u00a0\u201cthat\u2019s nice\u201d (I\u2019m starting to\u00a0think they downright didn\u2019t listen to\u00a0me\u00a0at\u00a0all). We\u00a0decided that we\u00a0wanted a\u00a0nice but simple ceremony and reception with our friends and relatives.\n\n

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\u00a9\u00a0Abdurrahim Israfilov \/ Pexels\n
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Lucas convinced me\u00a0to\u00a0invite my\u00a0parents and brother, but they never responded to\u00a0the invite. Whenever I\u00a0went to\u00a0visit and began to\u00a0talk about my\u00a0wedding (without mentioning it\u00a0was a\u00a0wedding), my\u00a0mom would always speak over me\u00a0and about my\u00a0brother\u2019s accomplishments and wild adventures. At\u00a0one point, I\u00a0got fed up\u00a0with it\u00a0and interrupted my\u00a0mom to\u00a0tell her that there was an\u00a0event\u00a0I was planning to\u00a0organize, whose date was unmovable. She told me\u00a0that they couldn\u2019t attend because my\u00a0brother was playing the last game of\u00a0the season that very same day, and wanted them to\u00a0be\u00a0there.\n

Of course, this favoritism didn\u2019t surprise me: they missed my ballets, shows, and both my high school and university graduation for things about him. At this point, I wanted to be petty. I told both my parents that it wasn\u2019t a problem to miss this event, purposely omitted the fact that this event was my wedding, and didn\u2019t insist further.\n\n

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\u00a9\u00a0Pixabay \/ Pexels\n
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Flash forward to\u00a0a\u00a0few weeks ago, I\u00a0got married. It\u00a0was perfect. My\u00a0family, Lucas\u2019 family, and our friends were all there, and we\u00a0had a\u00a0blast. My\u00a0grandpa was happy to\u00a0give me\u00a0away, and it\u00a0was just perfect. My\u00a0relatives asked me\u00a0multiple times why my\u00a0parents weren\u2019t there with\u00a0us. I\u00a0was honest and simply said they had my\u00a0brother\u2019s game to\u00a0attend, and couldn\u2019t come. They gave me\u00a0a\u00a0few looks, and my\u00a0grandpa was visibly angry for a\u00a0while, but otherwise, nothing strange happened.\n\n

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\u00a9\u00a0Dimitri Kuliuk \/ Pexels\n\n\n\n\n\n
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After the reception, Lucas and\u00a0I left for our honeymoon and were phone-free for the whole duration of\u00a0the trip. But once we\u00a0got back, we\u00a0discovered that a\u00a0storm was welcoming\u00a0us home. I\u00a0turned my\u00a0phone on\u00a0and was unable to\u00a0even unlock it\u00a0before a\u00a0storm of\u00a0notifications popped\u00a0up. Most of\u00a0them were from my\u00a0mother and brother. Mike called me\u00a0all sorts of\u00a0nasty names and insulted me\u00a0because one of\u00a0my\u00a0paternal aunts posted the photos of\u00a0the wedding on\u00a0Facebook, and captioned it\u00a0with a\u00a0very obvious dig at\u00a0my\u00a0parents (especially my\u00a0mom) for missing the wedding. The post went viral in\u00a0my\u00a0parents\u2019 community, and they\u2019ve been publicly shamed for their mistreatment of\u00a0me.\n

It\u00a0also turns out that my\u00a0grandpa personally visited my\u00a0parents to\u00a0go\u00a0on\u00a0a\u00a0tirade to\u00a0shame my\u00a0father, his son, to\u00a0the point of\u00a0tears. And this seemed to\u00a0be\u00a0my\u00a0father\u2019s breaking point, because he\u00a0was so\u00a0distraught for missing his only daughter\u2019s wedding and for his father\u2019s disapproval, that he\u00a0finally rebelled against my\u00a0mom and is\u00a0threatening divorce unless she makes it\u00a0up\u00a0to\u00a0me. I\u00a0think that\u2019s the reason why my\u00a0mom has been spamming my\u00a0phone with messages, at\u00a0first insulting and threatening and then downright pitiful, full of\u00a0begging and pity parties.\n\n

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\u00a9\u00a0Andrea Piacquadio \/ Pexels\n
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Now I\u2019m at\u00a0home with my\u00a0husband, deciding how to\u00a0approach the situation. Most of\u00a0my\u00a0relatives, even those\u00a0I didn\u2019t invite to\u00a0the wedding, reached out to\u00a0apologize for what\u00a0I went through and to\u00a0claim they had no\u00a0idea this was happening at\u00a0home (can\u2019t blame any of\u00a0my\u00a0relatives, they all live with my\u00a0grandpa on\u00a0the other side of\u00a0the country or\u00a0in\u00a0another state), but my\u00a0mom\u2019s sisters and friends are belittling me\u00a0for not telling my\u00a0mom about the wedding because now she\u2019s inconsolable at\u00a0the thought of\u00a0having missed my\u00a0wedding. Personally, I\u00a0think she just claims that to\u00a0save face, but I\u2019m not sure.\n

The latest messages from my\u00a0father and mother seem extremely saddened and hurt for missing my\u00a0wedding. Now my\u00a0family is\u00a0divided on\u00a0three fronts: the majority who is\u00a0sticking by\u00a0my\u00a0side, my\u00a0maternal aunts shaming me\u00a0for hurting my\u00a0mom\u2019s feelings, and my\u00a0maternal grandparents who are adamant that\u00a0I forgive my\u00a0mom in\u00a0light of\u00a0her \u201catonement.\u201d My\u00a0best friends are telling me\u00a0not to\u00a0listen to\u00a0them.\n\n

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People supported her.\n\n
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  • You enjoyed your day with people who really cared, and I\u2019d go\u00a0no\u00a0contact with the three of\u00a0them so\u00a0they can\u2019t have their special little boy forever. Seriously, cut these people off and keep them out of\u00a0your business and lives. They only came out because they were shamed into\u00a0it.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0Artlearninandchurnin\u00a0\/ Reddit\n
  • Actions have consequences. Mike is\u00a0the golden child to\u00a0the point of\u00a0things being dysfunctional. You have created your life accordingly based on\u00a0what they have done (your mum controlling everything and your dad enabling her) and now they\u2019re unhappy because they\u2019ve been shamed for\u00a0it. Too right! I\u00a0am however pleased your dad might be\u00a0waking\u00a0up.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0CityEvening\u00a0\/ Reddit\n
  • You invited them. You attempted to\u00a0remind them several times. They made it\u00a0very clear that it\u00a0wasn\u2019t a\u00a0priority to\u00a0them.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0jadepumpkin1984\u00a0\/ Reddit
    \nStick with the majority who are on\u00a0your side. The family and friends who supported you at\u00a0your wedding and continue to\u00a0support you now. The rest can go\u00a0to\u00a0hell in\u00a0a\u00a0handcart.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0HotFox4151\u00a0\/ Reddit\n\n\n
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    \u00a9\u00a0Samantha Gades \/ Unsplash\n

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    • \nThey were invited and didn\u2019t respond. Everyone who attended presumably got the same invitation and managed to\u00a0attend. Your mother and father chose to\u00a0attend your brother\u2019s game instead. Also, what atonement has your mother done? Feeling sorry for herself is\u00a0not atonement.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0henchwench89\u00a0\/ Reddit
      \nYou\u2019ve told them about the wedding, they got an\u00a0invite which they declined because of\u00a0your brother\u2019s last game and there\u2019s nothing you could\u2019ve done more. Just don\u2019t react, don\u2019t engage. You did well, although\u00a0I feel sad for you, but\u00a0I guess this was just the consequences of\u00a0their decades-long \u201cactions.\u201d Stop contact and enjoy your married life.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0MizzyvonMuffling\u00a0\/ Reddit\n
    • How exactly is\u00a0your mom supposed to\u00a0make up\u00a0for purposely ignoring your wedding? I\u00a0hope you told everyone accusing you of \u2019not telling your mom\u2019 that she received an\u00a0invitation and redirected every conversation regarding the wedding. Your parents aren\u2019t sorry they missed the wedding. They\u2019re sorry they got caught.\u00a0\u00a9\u00a0WomanInQuestion\u00a0\/ Reddit\n\n

      The bride\u2019s parents being absent on\u00a0her wedding day has evoked strong emotions and ignited discussions within the family, potentially leading to\u00a0long-term repercussions. This situation highlights the critical role of\u00a0communication and understanding in\u00a0families, serving as\u00a0a\u00a0reminder that weddings, despite their joyous nature,\u00a0can also reveal underlying issues.\n

      Preview photo credit\u00a0s***ty-mom-throwaway \/ Reddit,\u00a0Samantha Gades \/ Unsplash\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      A\u00a0Reddit user\u00a0disclosed\u00a0what happened. \u00a9\u00a0AA’s Photography \/ Pexels So\u00a0I\u00a0have a\u00a0younger brother, Mike. He\u00a0is\u00a0the definition of\u00a0a\u00a0man-child and a\u00a0mama\u2019s boy, always complaining, and always expecting others to\u00a0bow to\u00a0him. Ever since he\u00a0was born, my\u00a0parents fussed over him for everything. He\u2019s not special needs or\u00a0had a\u00a0traumatic birth or\u00a0anything of\u00a0the sort. He\u00a0was just… born. And my\u00a0parents completely discarded\u00a0me. My\u00a0mom especially. She …\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":83653,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[657],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-83649","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love-and-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83649","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/30"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=83649"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83649\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":83654,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83649\/revisions\/83654"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/83653"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=83649"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=83649"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/echowoven.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=83649"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}